My Restaurant Review
Greenville has a new restaurant. This is cause for great interest in the church. I understand, those of you living in larger areas think that the opening of a new restaurant is a fairly low priority item. But here in Greenville, with most of the restaurant fare being of the "fast-food" variety, a new sit-down restaurant rates a little higher on the interest meter.
The name of our new eatery is Cole Mountain. It has taken over the former residence of the Catty Shack who, for at least the second time I know of, had to close it's doors (no tremendous
loss, if you ask me). The Catty Shack dubiously tried to pass off a counterfeit version of the Bennigan's classic, Monte Cristo. They called their's the Monte Carlo. As a certified "Monte Cristo Expert" (a self-appointed title) I can affirm that it was a pitiful rendition of the greatest sandwich ever conceived. I believe that this may have been a key reason that the Catty Shack failed.
Anyway, being the Cole Mountain was open for business, a group from the church decided to venture over and check out "the new place."
The place was full, but our wait was only about 15-20 minutes. Not too bad for a Sunday right after church (if only our stupid preacher wouldn't preach so long ... hey wait!) We were seated and served drinks quickly. The restaurant got kudoes right off the bat for the giant 32-oz cups that drinks are served in. Many other places foolishly serve drinks in 12-oz glasses. With ice that means the beverage is gone in about three gulps. Not here at Cole Mountain ... here you get the Cole Mountain lake-sized beverage.
Our first clue that things might be amiss came with the appetizer portion of the meal. I noted the presence of fried pickles on the menu and so I ordered some. Within a short time, a basket of crispy fried goodness came to our table. They were great ... like the ones back at the Ballpark Diner in Allen, Texas (no longer open ... the Ballpark Diner was once the official eating place of the Smith family for about 8-10 meals a week ... also, it is speculated that the restaurant was named after my dog, Ballpark). Of course, imagine our good fortune as a few minutes later, another basket of fried pickles came to the table. Ten minutes later, this happened again though this time, the people at the table next to us claimed it was their order (not sure it was ... I think they just saw what was happening and tried to get in on it).
After finishing our 37 baskets of fried pickles. We sat back, loosened our belts and awaited the main course ... and we waited ... and waited ... and waited. It became clear that something was amiss. Some guessed it was a mix-up in the kitchen. I put forward the notion that it might have had something to do with religious persecution (but that may have been a reach). When I say it was a long time, we had not gotten our food after sitting there for about 75 minutes.
To put this in perspective: the people at the table next to us (remember, the pickle thieves) came in about 15-20 minutes after us, ate their dinner, conversated, paid their bill and then left and we still hadn't gotten our dinner. Our waitress would come back every once and awhile with a basket of bread to appease us. After eating 142 rolls, we got wise to that tactic (not that we stopped eating rolls).
Finally, members of our party actually got up to go. As for me, I had waited an hour and a half for chicken fried steak ... somebody was gonna get me some chicken fried steak before I left that place and I was thinking about demanding free dessert too! (ah, the seasoned negotiator). The part of our group that was leaving (let's call them "Jay and Becky"), were stopped by the manager, who vowed to clear this mess up and make it right. J & B returned and within a short time, our food was delivered.
My CFS was excellent, the mashed potatoes were exquisite and, as I mentioned, the fried pickles were top-notch. As we finally dined, the manager came out, offered her apologies and told us that the meal was on them for all of our troubles that day.
So, here is my review (bearing in mind that only two foods have ever rated five stars in my book ... the Monte Cristo and Saltgrass Restaurant Cheesecake ... and only one food has ever gotten zero stars in my book ... pickled beets ... though to be fair, most vegetables only rate a half star):
Why? Because they made it right when they messed up ... nice to see a place take responsibility and own up to a mistake rather than just seeking to blame someone else.
How come I did a restaurant review? Because midway through our wait, while showing off, I made a comment that Cole Mountain would receive the ultimate shame ... to be reviewed for my entire 3-5 person readership and now I have kept my promise!
If and when I do return, I will let you know how it goes ... since I am sure that you will be clamouring for those details.
One final note: don't do drugs!
The name of our new eatery is Cole Mountain. It has taken over the former residence of the Catty Shack who, for at least the second time I know of, had to close it's doors (no tremendous
loss, if you ask me). The Catty Shack dubiously tried to pass off a counterfeit version of the Bennigan's classic, Monte Cristo. They called their's the Monte Carlo. As a certified "Monte Cristo Expert" (a self-appointed title) I can affirm that it was a pitiful rendition of the greatest sandwich ever conceived. I believe that this may have been a key reason that the Catty Shack failed.Anyway, being the Cole Mountain was open for business, a group from the church decided to venture over and check out "the new place."
The place was full, but our wait was only about 15-20 minutes. Not too bad for a Sunday right after church (if only our stupid preacher wouldn't preach so long ... hey wait!) We were seated and served drinks quickly. The restaurant got kudoes right off the bat for the giant 32-oz cups that drinks are served in. Many other places foolishly serve drinks in 12-oz glasses. With ice that means the beverage is gone in about three gulps. Not here at Cole Mountain ... here you get the Cole Mountain lake-sized beverage.
Our first clue that things might be amiss came with the appetizer portion of the meal. I noted the presence of fried pickles on the menu and so I ordered some. Within a short time, a basket of crispy fried goodness came to our table. They were great ... like the ones back at the Ballpark Diner in Allen, Texas (no longer open ... the Ballpark Diner was once the official eating place of the Smith family for about 8-10 meals a week ... also, it is speculated that the restaurant was named after my dog, Ballpark). Of course, imagine our good fortune as a few minutes later, another basket of fried pickles came to the table. Ten minutes later, this happened again though this time, the people at the table next to us claimed it was their order (not sure it was ... I think they just saw what was happening and tried to get in on it).
After finishing our 37 baskets of fried pickles. We sat back, loosened our belts and awaited the main course ... and we waited ... and waited ... and waited. It became clear that something was amiss. Some guessed it was a mix-up in the kitchen. I put forward the notion that it might have had something to do with religious persecution (but that may have been a reach). When I say it was a long time, we had not gotten our food after sitting there for about 75 minutes.
To put this in perspective: the people at the table next to us (remember, the pickle thieves) came in about 15-20 minutes after us, ate their dinner, conversated, paid their bill and then left and we still hadn't gotten our dinner. Our waitress would come back every once and awhile with a basket of bread to appease us. After eating 142 rolls, we got wise to that tactic (not that we stopped eating rolls).
Finally, members of our party actually got up to go. As for me, I had waited an hour and a half for chicken fried steak ... somebody was gonna get me some chicken fried steak before I left that place and I was thinking about demanding free dessert too! (ah, the seasoned negotiator). The part of our group that was leaving (let's call them "Jay and Becky"), were stopped by the manager, who vowed to clear this mess up and make it right. J & B returned and within a short time, our food was delivered.
My CFS was excellent, the mashed potatoes were exquisite and, as I mentioned, the fried pickles were top-notch. As we finally dined, the manager came out, offered her apologies and told us that the meal was on them for all of our troubles that day.
So, here is my review (bearing in mind that only two foods have ever rated five stars in my book ... the Monte Cristo and Saltgrass Restaurant Cheesecake ... and only one food has ever gotten zero stars in my book ... pickled beets ... though to be fair, most vegetables only rate a half star):
- Chicken Fried Steak: 3 1/2 stars
- Mashed Potatoes: 3.6893 stars
- Fried Pickles: 4 stars
- Bread: gimme a break, it's bread, who cares
- Service: 1 star (with the understanding that they are working out new restaurant glitches)
- Price: 3 stars (I mean, it was free ... but I don't think I can count on that every time)
- Overall Waitress Attractiveness: Not for me to say as I am not so shallow, but Justin was convinced that one seemed interested in him
Why? Because they made it right when they messed up ... nice to see a place take responsibility and own up to a mistake rather than just seeking to blame someone else.
How come I did a restaurant review? Because midway through our wait, while showing off, I made a comment that Cole Mountain would receive the ultimate shame ... to be reviewed for my entire 3-5 person readership and now I have kept my promise!
If and when I do return, I will let you know how it goes ... since I am sure that you will be clamouring for those details.
One final note: don't do drugs!
I don't plan on doing drugs, or going to Bennigan's.
My first series of experiences at Bennigan's was at the missionary convention in Peoria. I played with Phil Mehrens in the worship, so we were staying at the Holiday Inn and our 3 meals a day were at Holiday Inn's Bennigan's. So we tried everything on the menu. The joke was "We've been again to Bennijan's." Got sick of it. More so of the service. They were swamped because of the convention and understaffed as it is. We wouldn't be able to eat until 11:00 p.m. usually. We started ordering room service 2 hrs. before we wanted to eat, being that that worked better and faster.
Then I tried Bennigan's this Christmas, because it was open. It was fine, but not great. Needless to say, I prefer other restaurants.
Posted by
Gregory Fish |
11:30 AM
Just to be clear ... I didn't say that Bennigan's is my favorite restaurant ... I was simply proclaiming the lofty status of the Monte Cristo. Greg, I note that you did not mention the Monte Cristo, should I then assume that you are a "moderately demented" individual and do not ascribe to its heretofore undisputed reign as "greatest sandwich ever"?
Posted by
Dave Smith |
1:05 PM
The greatness of the Monte Cristo was tainted immensly by the lack of service and slowness of the Peoria establishment. (It was really bad.) But I'll always remember it.
The Monte Cristo is too greasy for me, so at Christmas I tried an alternative to it: MONTE CRISTO PANINI. It was just alright. In closing, I will say it is amazing that Bennigan's has made it all the way down to Matamoros, Mexico across the border. I wonder if the MONTE CRISTO there is called el Mount Christ?
Posted by
Gregory Fish |
2:42 PM
Pansy!
Posted by
Dave Smith |
3:32 PM
How can a man who introduced me to "Scotch Eggs" ever bag on the Monte Cristo ... let me breakdown the math for you: Turkey/Ham/Cheese Sandwich + Donut Batter + Hot Oil + Powdered Sugar + Raspberry Jam = GENIUS
Posted by
Dave Smith |
10:16 PM
What is with the don't do drugs? I think my doctor would disagree as everytime I go to him he wants to prescribe a new one.
Posted by
Anonymous |
10:13 AM
Dave,
I just took the time to read your review and I think the Monte Cristo sandwich is the best sandwich in the world, but I've not had one at Bennigan's. We'll have to go next time I'm in Texas. We don't have a Bennigan's around her, but they have one in Matamoros? Crazy!
Posted by
Charissa |
6:01 AM
They say it's better in Matamoros. Hopefully they don't make drug legal there.
Posted by
Gregory Fish |
8:08 AM
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